Wash kein shee murshed?

Today was a pretty slow day as far as things go in Morocco, so I want to use this post to offer advice to future travelers going to Morocco and talk about some cultural experiences that surprised me. First the advice. This advice is specifically about Morocco, but it probably applies to most Arab countries.

1. Be careful what you wish for (out loud).
Once you become friends with Moroccans they will go to the ends of the earth to make you happy. This is why it's important not to voice any kind of desire unless you know what you're getting into. Even complimenting something is grounds to get you into trouble, as happened to me today.
Me: "This is a beautiful tajyeen (Moroccan cooking pot). How much does one cost at the sooq?"
My host mom: "Oh, just take any of these," she says, trying to hand me various tajyeens.
Me: "Oh, that very kind, no thank you. I can find one at the sooq."
MHM: "No, please take it, as a souvenir from us. I can buy another one any time."
Me: [super awkwarded out] "No, thank you for offering. I'll go to the market, I like to buy things."

2. Don't accept "favors" from people.
Moroccans are experts at exploiting a psychological effect known as reciprocity. People on the street will do all sorts of favors for you...but not because bless-their-hearts-they're-so-kind. They want a tip. And as I've written previously, tipping is expected in Morocco for all kinds of favors, big and small. It even occurs in places you'd never expect.
For instance, I was visiting Hassan al-Tanee (Hassan II), the largest mosque in Morocco. I walked downstairs into the mosque and a member of the cleaning staff led me through a door into a very dark room. It was a beautiful hall filled with low marble fountains that are designed for men entering the mosque to perform ablutions (washing their hands and feet before prayer). A man in an abayya (traditional, light robe) came up to me, and started telling me about the purpose of the room and its history. He saw I saw taking pictures, so he said, "No, you're taking pictures of the wrong things." He grabbed my camera and began taking pictures of art on the walls and Arabic script on the columns. He then told me to pose for a picture, and so, reluctantly, I did so. I thanked him for his help and on the way out the door he held out his hand and said, "Tadweera, tadweera" (tip). This had happened to me before, but in a mosque? I was offended, but I said, "I'm sorry, I don't have money with me" (which was true...that time) and left the building.
I'll give him credit and say that he accepted my refusal to tip gracefully. The previous time this happened, it ended with me yelling "What is your problem? Get the hell away from me!" for the second time since I've been here.
So the lesson is, don't let people do you favors. No "I have a very generous friend who just happens to be a taxi driver..."; "I can show you the way to that restaurant..."; "Do you need a guide of the old city?" No no no.

My story of intercultural experience comes with another lesson: be prepared to be surprised.
I was at a qahwa in Dar al-Bayda with my host dad and his cousin when his cousin asked, "What was your impression of Morocco before you came here?"
I told him, "My friends and family, as well as my host family, made me nervous about coming here at first. Americans really emphasize the potential dangers of the region, such as terrorism, crime, disease, culture shock, political oppression, etc. But when I got here I realized that these fears really apply to the worst case scenarios, whereas most of the risks I run here are no more threatening than in the United States. It didn't help though, that there was a bombing in Marrakesh a month before I arrived. Americans are worried about the influence and potential threats of Islamists and Islamist parties in the Middle East" (sidenote: the term "Islamist" refers to someone who believes public policy should be based on Islamic law and thought. It does not mean the same thing as "Muslim").
My host dad said "No, Islamist parties are no threat. Tell me, who do you think perpetrated the attacks of September 11th, 2001?"
I was taken aback at the question, but I answered, "A group of mostly Saudi young men..."
"Yes, but bin Laden, right?" interrupted my host dad.
"Yeah, bin Laden," I answered.
He gave me a knowing look and said, "No, no, no. Bin Laden didn't do it. It was the American government who did it and blamed Islamists. Have you seen pictures of the Pentagon? That damage was caused by a rocket, not a plane. And who has the rockets to do that? The Americans."
I didn't know what to say at first. It is clearly illogical that the United States government would attack its own citizens, let alone the headquarters of the Department of Defense in order to sow fear of Islamists. But I couldn't really articulate this in Arabic, so I said, "This is a story that some people believe, but most people, including me, find that there is no evidence that 9/11 was perpetrated by someone other that bin Laden, especially not the US government."
"It's the same thing as here," said my host dad. "The bombing in Marrakesh wasn't planted by Islamists, it was planted by the Moroccan government to terrorize people and subjugate them."
My host dad's cousin jumped in and said, "No, no, I don't believe these things. It was the fault of Islamists" and they argued for a bit before changing the subject.

I was, again, taken aback by my host dad's comments, but I have a hypothesis about why he believes these conspiracy theories. My host dad is a very devout Muslim, and when I mentioned the fear that Americans have for Islamists, I think he wanted to defend these parties because he supports them, or feels that they reflect on him. He wanted to defend the reputation of Muslims by distancing himself from the violence that some self-proclaimed Muslims perpetrated. And his comments about the Moroccan government organizing the bombing in Marrakesh made me realize that he, like many Moroccans, has developed a deep distrust for government, and doesn't feel that political leaders in Morocco are defending his interests.

It was a sobering moment, either way.